Why relationships end badly

Many will sacrifice their self, move countries and devote themselves entirely to their partner, hoping the love will be reciprocated in return. Yet they become hurt, feel betrayed or angry when their partner does not return the hard work and efforts that they put in the relationship.

All of a sudden their desired partner says they are nagging or attacking them, and so they drift away further, not understanding all the self-sacrifices and losses that one has faced for the disillusioned fantasy of finding unconditional love. If you change your life to suit your relationship, compromising or sacrificing oneself; then this can destroy relationships or cause the relationship to end badly.

A healthy relationship begins with a healthy sense of self. By attending to our own needs, motivations, desires, and aspirations, allows us to feel whole and happy inside. We then have more capacity and inner resources to fulfill our own self-esteem, so we do not become dependent on a relationship to fulfill our own happiness. Looking for happiness in others, causes many to feel anxious, depressed and alone. Relying on others to make us feel good about ourselves is unrealistic, it escapes one from facing painful feelings inside, by looking for others to take it away.

Relationship counseling offers individuals the opportunity to work on their self or relationship. Seeing a psychotherapist or relationship specialist can resolve these relationship patterns so they do not become repeated and continually acted out. Many spouses will project their past hurts or unmet needs onto their partner, hoping that their quest for love will be finally met, but sadly this revives their pain and distress, leading relationships to breakdown.

Many enter therapy when they reached the depths of their despair, to avoid these hurts, and actually end up reliving all the anxiety and depression that they attempted to avoid.

So they forego their own individual identity or aspects of themselves to meet the expectations of their spouse. This leads to feelings of being trapped and wanting to leave the relationship just to escape the pressure.

Sound familiar? While everyone has their own dealbreakers , it's important to assess what yours are and if the relationship can still continue. However, if one of you lets selfishness overpower selflessness, watch out. Carla Marie Manly , clinical psychologist, relationship expert, and author of the upcoming Joy from Fear , tells Bustle.

Do you feel like you and your partner have grown so much together, there's no more growing to do? Skip to content Skip to primary sidebar Skip to footer. What should you do when your relationship ends badly? Source This mixture of emotions is normal, and you need time to sort them out. Avoid: Allowing feelings of inadequacy overwhelm you.

Letting shame and despair overcome you. How can you distance yourself? Spend time with people that will lift your spirits. This will help counteract the negative emotions raging inside you. Do things that make you feel good. Treat yourself to a massage, a little shopping, or cook a nice dinner for yourself.

If you like traveling, take some time off and go on a trip. This is a tricky one because both can make sense, depending on you. Related reading: Are You Emotionally Unavailable? Featured image source Share on Facebook.

Follow us. Leave a Reply Cancel reply Your email address will not be published. Find the Daily Minder on Instagram. Follow on Instagram. This error message is only visible to WordPress admins Error: No posts found.